I just got back from a wealth lecture about 2 hours ago. I love going to events from this particular company because I went to their almost-free three day seminar two years ago and I thought it was amazing and life changing. And no, I’m not mentioning the name of the company because that’s not the point of this blog entry.
A few years ago, my wife and I attended their 3-day financial seminar. Tonight’s lecture reminded me of the that seminar which sticks in my mind to this day. As an INFP, it was one of the harder things I’ve had to do.
I’m in my late 30s and I probably wouldn’t have gone in my 20s when I thought I knew everything. INFPs like to find their own way because it’s about the journey and that so opposite of what this seminar was. Seminars are about someone teaching you their particular way of doing things. I’ve always been a bit rebellious about being told how to live my life.
In trying to find my way to certain goals, I often re-invented the wheel. That was fine in my 20s when it seemed like I had all the time in the world, but now I feel that sometimes, it is about the destination. I’d rather be financially free then just be in the process of becoming financially free.
Another issue I had with the 3-day seminar was the active audience participation which included speaker-audience response, group recitations of key points and activities which can feel pretty silly. Going to a seminar, there is a certain amount of groupthink and brainwashing that occurs. The INFP in me defines my identity by my individuality, by not being like everyone else. However, the only way to really get the most out of that seminar was to be like everyone else and to immerse myself into someone else’s way of thinking.
Lastly, many of the activities from that 3-day seminar required that you reveal personal details about your history and your feelings to complete strangers. That was very uncomfortable and so against INFP type for me.
So why did I subject myself to this? Because it changed the behaviors I wanted changed and I’m a better person because of it.
I think that was my biggest hangup as an INFP in my 20s. I was adamant about who I was and what I liked and what I didn’t like and what I felt comfortable doing and what I thought wasn’t me. All those restrictions of this-is-me and this-isn’t-me as I got older became a very small box to try to fit myself in.
Going to that seminar two years ago wasn’t unusual. I’m open to learning new things. However, fully participating in spite of feeling silly or ridiculous wasn’t something I would have done in my 20s. I realized that the things that I’ve always done wasn’t getting me to where I wanted to go. I couldn’t keep doing the same things, taking the same actions and expecting to get a different result.
I like going to these types of success/self-help seminars because I always learn something new that I haven’t read or heard before. At the lecture I went to tonight, this is what stuck in my mind:
I’m not as successful as I like because I don’t have to be. I have other options. I have the option of living my comfortable middle class life with the yearly vacations without any extra effort.
That gave me a lot to think about. So for the next few days, I’ll be re-evaluating my commitment to my goals.
I took a break last Wednesday to figure out the direction of this blog and where I wanted it to go. As an INFP, I don’t quite know if I’m doing things right, but I certainly know when I’m doing it wrong. That was how I felt about my blog entries.
My previous blog entries are just my very opinionated opinions and sometimes even I don’t really care about my opinions so why should I expect someone else to care. The purpose of this blog was to give someone a better understanding of what it means to be an INFP. My opinions aren’t what makes me an INFP. It’s what I do and what I don’t that defines me, that defines what kind of INFP I am. That is what I’ll try to share.